LAST JOB INTERVIEW

This is my last job interview
I gots degrees from universities, they say this is what I do
Hiring man says "I don't think you can" and I'm staring at my shoes
This is my last job interview

Tried to drive a school bus but they say that I go too fast
Tried to be a teacher but my students couldn't pass
Tried to be a fireman but the smoke it makes me cough
And when I worked down at the porn shop I couldn't wait 'til I'd get off

This is my last job interview
Ms. Polyester says I'm through
Can't find a way to make some pay, what can I do?
Well there's no work and my feet hurt from worn out shoes
Can't stand no more job interviews

My self esteem is dropping fast
And sleeping late has gone and lost its charm don't know how long I'll last
When your unemployed weekends are a void, just another day to lose
Don't want no more job interviews

I was a man of the collar, but I got collared
Tried to drive a boat, but I ain't got no float
Tried to sell used cars but I just couldn't make a deal
When I tried to be a cop I got caught copping me a feel

This is my last job interview
Mr. Mustache tells me that I'm through
I'm done before I've started I need something to do
The classifieds they tell me lies, say "WE WANT YOU!"
Should've seen my last job interview

I walked on in, sat myself down, said "how do you do?'
He looked me over, resume in hand and said "Tell me 'bout you"
I said I made a million dollars
For my last company
I found a cure for cancer
And helped the blind to see
He looked at me cross-eyed
Like he just couldn't believe
Well keep you in our files, if it works out we'll dial
Close the door when you leave

This is my last job interview
People tell me that I'm through
Can't find a way to make some pay, what can I do?
Well there's no work and my feet hurt from worn out shoes
This is my last job interview